Denying, Deny, Denied
Moralizing again: One of the most commonly used words in Thai politics is the word “deny” in all its forms and variations. In the most typical use of the word wrongdoings are denied, while Thailand’s higher-ups even denied the maltreatment of Rohingya boat refugees without batting an eye, even though there was ample proof of outright lies.
To be able to deny is an essential part of being a public figure in Thailand. Most often you’re more busy denying accusations than being constructively engaged for the betterment of the nation and society. Under favorable circumstances, wearing the correct color of a shirt, you can even deny that you’re a violent thug.
Not being a gifted denier automatically lessens one’s chances of succeeding as a figure of prominence in Thailand, as there’s hardly a leader left who is not bothered by annoying court cases or some libel suit. But how about you? As a kid I assume you were taught the values of right and wrong, the accuracy of the words yes and no – and the moral implications of misusing them.
I mean, there’s commonly no gray area left when you’re using the words yes and no. But over the years living in Thailand you make the bittersweet experience that a yes is not necessarily a yes and that a no by no means has to mean no. The culture of denying, in turn, has to be understood in this context of Thai people’s quite flexible usage of facts as a matter of fact.
The language of signs is more important than the actual precision of words. Observe a person, listen to the sound of the voice, the body language, hidden signals – and you may understand way better than simply listening to words.
Which can be a very freeing experience. Or you tell me, has your moral framework remained solid as a rock over the years in Thailand? Or you’ve become slightly more flexible dealing with correctness, punctuality, honesty, reliability and such? Or still feel guilty for being five minutes too late for an appointment?
Or you’re not even allergic to white lies any longer?
Open up, relax, hang loose. Give this flexible culture of denying a try. Make your own laws, as strangely as they spin, the law of the world.
You’ll be able to rebut accusations with ease. And your adopted country is much more easily understood.
Your article is soooooooo true! I’ve lived here for nearly 18 years now in the northeast, and having been brought up in England, lying (denying, if you will) has always seemed very anti everything that I was ever taught. However, it is often necessary in order to get by in daily life here. Thais seem to expect a lie or a denial. When you give a truthful answer, they seem to dislike it. A long-time Thai friend once advised me that if I wanted to get by in Thailand, bend the truth as much as you can without verging on breaking the law – then everyone will understand you, accept you, and you will not have any problems. And, what he said has been tried and proved to be true on several occasions. BTW – I deny writing any of the above. You did not read this.
It seems, in most of the debates of farang vs. Thai culture over the years, that the Thai culture is always the one with the “problem” and “worse” than the culture of the foreign writer. And likewise, Thai writers have their own stylized ways of pointing out how the farang culture is the “problem” and “worse” than Thai culture. So who is right? and where is the empirical evidence to back these claims? Anectdotes extrapolated from social situations and newspaper observations to cover all of reality seems like a dangerous truth pursuing strategy. I am not saying there is no denial, just that relative claims are dubious in my opinion.
I may ask though, in what country is it the case that politicians are not denying everything!! Come on this is universal almost. In the U.S., our leaders and businesss people and everyone seem to live in a permanent state of denial. Occassionally folks spill the beans or confess, but I am not convinced that “U.S. denial” is any less than Thai denial. Even if Thai denial were greater, does it really matter … you really think it will change in the future? Outside of politics, people in the US deny stuff all the time … I think it just seems that “we” don’t because we are taught to see ourselves and our culture as immune from fault and honest, yet in reality this is so far from the truth.
Don’t we have to differentiate between denying wrongs and rights and denying the obvious Mr. Wrigley?
BangkokDan
I think this a very accurate post. I became a lot happier in Thailand when I realised that lying (and denial) is a normal part of Thai culture and it’s built into everyday language. It’s become very useful at work – when you understand the reason many staff give for not doing something is not the real reason at all.
In Asian culture in general there is less logical reasoning, more inter-connectedness to events and relationships, stronger hierarchy and opinions which are constantly being shaped and influenced by others.
In areas which are not personal (that is, not about saving face) I find that Thais are refreshingly honest and direct. I particularly like the fact that they avoid the politically correct, sensitive language which is so prevalent in the West.
[...] 21, 2009 by chdarat I came across a blog by Being Farang called DENYING, DENY, DENIED. The blog suggested that the most overused word in Thai politics today is “DENY”. This was [...]