The Female Sex Tourist
Call it hypocrisy: How the Bangkok Post dropped the Nite Owl a few years ago, but enjoys good business with classifieds such as “Barbar – Fetish Experience,” “V.I.P. Models – Business Men Choice” – or “Body Club – Oil Massage by Men.”
Massage by men. Not only for men. There’s quite a trade in town of male prostitutes offering their services to female clients.
Talk about it with associate professor Nither Tinnakul of Chulalongkorn’s Department of Sociology. He did a study about this newer escort culture. Puts the number of female prostitutes in Thailand at 100,000. The number of male prostitutes at a not less staggering 30,000.
Professor Tinnakul’s project was mainly aimed at new escort services that are importing hundreds of prospective black gigolos – “forungs” – from Jamaica and Africa to Thailand to satisfy the surge in the demand for these services among the Thai female elite.
According do Tinnakul Thai women are paying upwards of 10,000 baht per night for the servicers, who are “fiercer”, more “thrilling” in bed and more “well built” than their Thai peers. Or Western peers for that?
But it is not only lust driving a market that is mainly kept under cover. We’re all aware of the old culture of cut off penises here in the Land of the Free. Thai women are leaders in penis slashing. The tradition has kind of died down. Or has it?
Read, in this context, our story about Mara Altman who still hasn’t orgasmed in Bangkok.
But one of the lingering effects of the Asian economic crisis is prevailing as ever: The women’s need for revenge against their philandering husbands. “The women want some equal rights,” says Tinnakul. “Some kind of freedoms. They need something.”
Tinnakul goes on: “Male prostitutes here not only serve for Thai women, but also for Western females and female tourists from mainly Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong and Singapore.”
Oho, and what about the “horny Japanese housewives heading off to Bangkok to grab a slice of the Thai life“?
We talk about substantial figures.
How they get their servicers? “Mostly through friends,” professor Tinnakul told absolutely. “They have their own networks and websites. There are bars and places. It is had to get into these circles, they’re built on trust” – but are all common and readily available in Bangkok.
And constantly evolving. Professor Tinnakul did the research some years ago. “Nothing basically changed. The balance of supply and demand is still the same.” With supply increasing during more difficult economic times – and prices falling with falling arrivals of relevant tourists.
The local male market prostituting itself consists of Thais as well as immigrants, Tinnakul says. “Thais and immigrants are more for the tourism market” – whereas the long-perpetrated image of the black man as a sexual toy flourishes as a niche market among higher-up Thai females.
Call them “escorts” or “gigolos” – they’re a stereotype, but not rare here in Thailand, as the comprehensive study of Tinnakul shows.
Sensing any racial degradation? Sexual prowess at the cost of black men being less progressive or caring? And honestly, I don’t see too many black men around anymore lately …
How scandalized Thai society felt by Tinnakul’s report. Since in paying for the favors of such men, Thai women are defying tradition. A Thai top politician was quoted as saying that all the hoopla about foreign gigolos raised by Tinnakul’s report was undermining the good traditional Thai family and making men suspicious of their wifes.
And don’t forget about the so called Thai ballroom dancers: Mostly young, good looking dancers and dance teachers who spend their Saturday evenings and Sundays in the company of an elder, paying Thai lady – who not only expects to dance.
Tinnakul knew about the sensitivity of his research. He says he was just uncovering what is viewed as a taboo in Thai society: “This exists in the Thai society – just look at the English newspaper for an example. You look at the advertising and you’ll find lots of advertising about this kind of job,” Tinnakul once told Australia’s ABC. “This topic is not talked about because it is something people don’t think it exists in Thai society – or maybe think it’s not a good thing to talk about it.”
Fact is: forungs fetch the highest prices.
“The place where most male prostitutes are from though,” says professor Tinnakul, “is Cuba. A student of mine did the research. Cuba seems to be the world’s biggest market with male prostitution and female tourists.”
Met any Cuban lately?
And competition here in Thailand is ever increasing, the professor says. With white male prostitutes arriving from Europe.
Why all the black and white servicers in Thailand?
“Maybe,” says the professor, “they can satisfy the women better.”
Interesting. The so far by far most read story on this site – and nobody caring to comment.
BangkokDan
My white girlfriend was served by a male Thai prostitute and did not regret it at all.
Rainer
There is nothing much to say as the story has been told quite q few times before. It is something that we all know, and some even take part in it.
Can anybody specify the locations? I really want to go … indeed.
That’s exactly the question I asked the professor, Saiya.
He didn’t tell me any.
BangkokDan
Got several emails of men praising their manhood in all colors with all contact details and such.
Sadly folks this is not the place to advertise your skills.
There are tons of places in Big Mango to make your rut call be heard.
BangkokDan
I will be bringing my girl friend to Bangkok in Oct, next month. Where can I find gigolo (local as well as Eurasian) for her to have some fun? And how much is the service?
… as far as I rembember my girl made her first contact somewhere on Sukumvit Road. Be aware of the consequences for your relationsship, if she really intends to do be bedded by a Thai boy: What was supposed to be a one-night stand went totally wrong in my case. Once the Thai lover had sex with her and he knew she enjoyed it, he immediately seized his chance for “long term sex” with a white girl and constant good payment. The next morning he quickly chocked my resitance, fastened his grip on my girlfriend and took my girl over for the rest of our holidays. You may read more if you google: “My girlfriend had paid sex with a Thai boy” or “Why did I let my girlfriend had paid sex with a Thai boy.”
Rainer
Hallo Rainer & Claudia,
Sorry dass ich mich so lange nicht mehr gemeldet habe (ich habe eine “herausfordernde” Zeit hinter mir). Ich hoffe es geht euch gut und ich gratuliere euch besser spät als nie ganz herzich zu eurer Verlobung! Ich bin gerne bereit, unseren anregenden Gedankenaustausch fortzusetzen.
Liebe Grüsse,
Stefan
I absolutely understand Rainer, the same thing happened and still happens to me and my girlfriend. We just came back from a one month long vacation in Thailand. It is not at all an easy situation to be in and to deal with. Either it destroys the relationship or it moulds it even stronger together than before. My sympathy and best wishes go out to Rainer and all other men in our situation who dare not speak in public about their humiliation.
Thanks Steph! Not just another abusive comment!
You are still the only one who openly admits that he had to share his girl with a Thai. I believe strongly that not only single female travelers from Europe seek contact to young Thai guys, but also some who travel with their partners.
On the one hand there are our farang girls, who feel attracted by exotic Thai guys … on the other hand there are the very smart and clever Thai guys luring our girls: The very easy and big cash young Thai beach boys/money boys can make with an interested white girl seems to be so tempting that they try everything to isolate her from her Western partner … if the Western guy is too weak, too nice, too polite, to scared, (… as we obviously were) the greater the chance for the Thai competitor to bed the farang girl.
Rainer
For all of you men that want this to happen, and allow it to happen, hopefully you enjoy it. If you do not want to happen, then tell you gf/wife to stop. If you are not man enough to stop her, then you deserve what you get. I was married to a woman that was unfaithful to me, and I was glad when I found out. Sometimes it takes extreme situations to find out what your partner is really like. Leave her, divorce her, or use this as an excuse for you to be unfaithful. But do not just sit there and take it like a pussy!
Incredible article, it’s hard to say what the cause of the phenomenon is, it’s difficult to come to grips with what some people consider cheating. Male escorts are in business though, and the people who seek them out are responsible for the effects on their own personal lives. Make sure you do something about it!
Read this article by a guy who lived for a long time in Thailand about thai beach boys, how they “capture” white girls for fun, sex and money. An excellent article which shows the truth!
http://www.travelpod.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=6742&pid=217701&st=0&#entry217701
Rainer
Random thoughts/questions stirred by this posting :
1. I still miss Bernard Trink’s column in the Bangkok Post.
2. I am familiar with the Thai word falang/farang but not “forung.” Is this a way of denoting that you are talking about a “chocolate man”?
3. If you take your wife/girlfriend to Thailand for vacation and plan to do a little carousing yourself then I think it is only fair that your wife/girlfriend be allowed to do so as well. If you don’t then she shouldn’t either.
4. Interesting question – “what about the “horny Japanese housewives heading off to Bangkok to grab a slice of the Thai life”?”
Years ago when I worked in northern Japan the Japanese men would go to Thailand for sex and the Japanese women would go to Bali for male companionship – not necessarily for sex but rather to have a man treat them as they wanted to be treated because their husbands would not. Apparently the times they are a changing.
Why is it cool for girls to buy sex but when men do it they considered low life scum by the mainstream?
I must admit Tom is basically right … I was overwhelmed by Bangkok, by the sudden sex fantasies of my girlfriend, by the growing willingness to do it with a young Asian and by the absolute determination of Thai gigolos who preyed on her and our holiday budget once sensing her readiness and my weakness. And finally? Yes, I did let it happen … maybe hoping it will be just a quick and regrettable one-night stand. But it went all the other way.
A lot of other guys (especially European and American guys) had only hatred and contempt for me and my confession. On the other hand some Chinese and Vietnamese guys offered Claudia and me even money to get a photo from her. I know quite well that only very few Asians will ever have a chance to insamenate a white girl … and however I try to justify my weakness in Bangkok I am totally aware that a young Asian practically made me to a castrated underdog in front of my girl, who enjoyed openly sex with the “fitter” guy once I accepted the new hierachy.
I believe it is an unthinkable situation and total taboo situation for most Westerners, which caused so many angry reactions. On the other hand my relationship to Claudia has changed but not to the negative. We love each other and she has become my fiancé. It is not that she has contempt for me since Bangkok, but she takes out the right to have occassionally sex with suitable smart young Asians and expects me to tolerate it. The situation fits her as she can rely on me anytime as her partner. Since Bangkok their is no need for her to hide her very special sexual fantasies or to cheat on me but to live them unrestricted … and believe me, my jealousy never stops. This is the high price what I have to pay to accept a total taboo and again I wonder with how many any other Western males I share the same fate …?
AVOID STEREOTYPES: Believe me, MY FARANG Girl does NOT HATE Thailand, she is not passive when it comes to date Thai guys she finds suitable for a sex affair and pay the youngster for her/his fun instead of wailing around about Thai girls and white guys. I wonder if I should hate Thailand … but I don’t!
(BD: I fear not too many Rainer, yours’ a very liberal approach …)
WTF?? Are you guys serious?? If you share your girl with another man, you are a moron!!
… yes I am serious, and things like this happen.
It is still better as if your girl is cheating secretly on you.
het rainer i think u are a troll becuse u are way too descriptive,,u are a woman writing all that trash,,a man who went through that stuff like u said u did ,,would ,,could never waste his time talkin bout that in such a circular openended pointless manner except if ! u ! are !in fact ! a female! pretending to be a !guy!im sure ure either a young female tring to get into the heads of us men,,also u could be an older female who has never had a true meaningfull caring loving ,passionate relationship with a man.i can tell by your words…anyway either way sex 4 cash so retarded,,its better if 2 people like each other and make love becuse they are hormonal,,and enjoy each others company than later on sex would avail itself to both sides like a free trade agreement. sex 4 cash does seem desperate..when women expect me to be a socalled typical
guy and pay them cash i just look at them and laugh,,sex 4 cash with no real love i tell them ,,is like food without flavor,,when ur not hungry for food,,,,,next u should see the confused and dazed dizzy faces on the women who i tell that to..hahaha,,i personally feel many times not always that the man has a weakness and is exploited by the women,,lets face it men reaaly hate when they are with a woman who hides her true ,honest normal civilized emotions,,we men know when u women arent secure with ur selves,,,becuse u get all silent,and talkative,,at the same time,itell you people who in the world wants to always have the idea ,memory ,recolection that you slept,had sex with a strange woman u could would never trust? nasty sad,thought when ,if u get married u will always remember u lost ur virginity to a women ..or a man who was not in love with u or a person u had to pay to orgasm with? how sad,and used exploited for mens money and womens bodies,,all men and women suffer men suffer emotional stress as they grow older and realize they were tricked by beauty ,,and women realize they were tricked by there own insecure emotions,of not knowing how to think 4 themselves.
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Alberto Camorali, Clara Boxall. Clara Boxall said: Social taboo or empowerment? Asian women buying men like they buy women. Female Sex Tourism, #Thailand http://bit.ly/eQRxt3 [...]
this is more comon then some people think, women are very complicated beings who needs appreciation and alot of attention, if a women gets bored you have a problem, thats wy guys who are assholes always gets the chicks, because there are more action, don’t you guys often wonder why that asshole gets all the ladys?
sure we say we want a nice, wellspeakened, polite guy who give us comftable lifes, but the thing is that it doesn’t matter if shes married o whatever, she can have a dream or fantasy or just be the prudest girl ever because when the right guy appears at the right time with all the excitement and tabbo at stake its somehow feels good, if your girl are bored you have a problem in that situation, girls want to have the cake and eat it to!
But probably the stupiest thing your man can do at that time is to approve it, it doesn’t matter if its about a thai guy, a gangbang or just fuck another dude, because when you have allowed it it will only grow bigger and bigger in a females head because all the women in the world wide wouldn’t say no to a fun, mysterious and dangerous experience, but we girls are stupid to because at that moment we don’t think at everything we have home and the consequenses for our actions
But Rainer i don’t know how old you are and for how long you have been thogether with claudia, if its children involded now or what had happend now,
but one thing i know is that there is 2 reactions to what you have experienced, theres the jeoulious wariant with the stone in the stumic and a living hell for the brain, i really hope you doesn’t think about it everyday and everytime you guys have sex, wich is normal after that experience, the other wariant is alot like the first one but it could be a turn one for the husband to, some guys like to be humiliated and because of that it makes the relationship a little bit easier,
but i really hope you fix that selfesteme and duscuse with claudia that you want to to the same thing just to se the reaction and then make a disiction after that reaction if you want her to stop being unfatful or if you both should have the same rights, your not alone and there are many guys who let themselves get abused in realtionships like that, but if you not put an end to it or something that makes you feel better you will be barrying yourself with alot of stress and physical pain! stand up for youself and respect yourself ! sorry about the shitty english!
Cameron Ola: Thanks for your excellent comment! It is exactly how it happens. It helped me further to open my eyes and I believe now that women like my Claudia who are in relationship with “weak” males will soon or later take out the right to have sex with their preferred partners, in Claudia’s case exclusively young Asian guys in their early twenties. Once they have bedded a white lady they develop an absolute boosting self-confidence.
Please let me add to your theory that I think that, in addition what you say, there are “strong” and “inferior” males. The strong ones usually “cage” their wifes/girlfriend etc. and mange to keep male competitors away from their females. Whereas the inferior males are under big stress: They cannot openly and publicly admit that they feel inferior to other males nor can they admit it to their wifes/ girlfriends … because society will not tolerate this behavior. As inferior males they are under permanent stress to loose their wifes to superior males.
I cannot speak for other couples but Claudia as a women found quickly out that I am an inferior male. I believe any woman will find out soon or later what status her male has, if she is in a relationship with a male for some time.
Humiliating me extremley with the young “strong” Asian (he was only 19 years I was 30 years!) was maybe the wrong thing to do. But on the other hand it made very clear to me that I could not prevent my girl from opening her tighs for this young self-confindent Asian, nor did I dare to confront him and chase hime away. It is brutal, but within a couple of days there was a clear hierarchy between us three, in which I had to take my place on the very bottom or loose my girl. The humiliation was so extreme because he was 1. an Asian money boy 2. Asians male are in the Western media always considered as weaker than Western men and often serve only as toy boys for gay and are pictured as not being able to satisfy western women 3. the Asian men small penis myth and 4. I had to pay him openly and in public respect as my girls holiday lover … and she encouraged me to accept him as “the winner” to avoid tensions. Yes like I said, for a Western male this treatment is cruel.
But if I am honest, was its Claudia fault or the Thai guy’s fault who seized his chance to penetrate a white women and live on a Western holiday’s couple budget? No, I did, as an inferior male, let it happen. Claudia if you like helped me in a shock therapy to open my eyes and if you like uncaged her sexuality in that Bangkok night in 2007. There is nothing bad to be an inferior man but one must be ready to accept the rules.
For Claudia the situation is now at it best as she is together with an absolute reliable partner who will never cheat on her, whereas she has seized her right to have sex with prefered young Asians as often as she likes, without fearing any punishment/ revenge from an inferior male. I myself also commence to accept the situation realizing that not all man can be superior and some, like me, will always have to accept to share their wifes and will be only “someone in the queue” when it comes to wild sex. I reckon further that for women who want to explore fully their sexuality it makes sense to seek a relationship with a soft and inferior male who is absolutely reliable when it comes to managing daily live, bringing up his kids (…or even the bastard-babies of a competitor as his own offspring in order to fulfill expected social norms and to protect thereby the good reputation of his wife) , etc.
I am still desperately trying to find more Westeners who had to share their wifes with Asian men … but I reckon it is a too big shame to talk about it in public and there are only very few cases.
Rainer